“The act of discarding things on its own will never bring joy to your life. Discarding is not the point; what matters is keeping those things that bring you joy.”
– Marie Kondō
When you renovate your house, when you move, when you declutter, things tend to get very messy before they get settled, uncluttered, and organized again. The same is true when we clear out the clutter inside of us. It’s often a slow process, but the effort is worth the reward.
There’s a popular book called, The Life-Changing Magic of Tidying Up: The Japanese Art of Decluttering and Organizing, by Marie Kondō. My favorite concept from the book is where you hold each thing you own and decide whether it sparks joy for you. If it doesn’t you thank it for being in your life and release it. A friend said her therapist suggested reading this book and using the same principles for cleaning up the relationships in her life. Look at each one and ask, “Does this person spark joy in me?” If not, bless it and let it go (or take the steps to transform it). With this process you don’t decide what to get rid of, but what to keep.
We often hold on to old possessions because of sentimental value, or we spent so much money or time to get, maintain or keep it, or we’re afraid of letting go of it because we may use it (or want it) one day. In many ways we hold onto relationships for the same reasons. It’s easier to toss an old t-shirt than a friendship, but when we let go of the things, habits and people who no longer spark joy in our lives space is freed up in an uncluttered heart for a fire to ignite within. A fire whose light will lead us exactly where we need to be, doing what we’re meant to be doing, and with whom we’re meant to be doing it with.
